“Write clear and hard about what hurts.” ~ Ernest Hemingway
The
memoir piece I wrote for the anthology – “Legacy of a Childless Woman” – is one that
has been pushing at me for years, begging to be told. When I read about the
Women’s Writing Circle anthology, it seemed like a message – now’s the time.
I’d kept so much inside for so long – just locked it away and moved on.
Sitting
in the Women’s Writing Circle for the first time and hearing other women share
their stories – some joyful or funny, some heart wrenching and brave – inspired
me to share my own.
I sat in
a circle with a dozen women I’d never met. Susan lit a candle and declared it a
safe place to share our stories. I’d brought just a few paragraphs – the fitful
start of the story I wanted to tell. I listened as others read. Beautiful
writing; touching stories. As the talking stone passed from one to another, my
stomach clenched. Would I read or wouldn’t I? I tried, but I couldn’t choke out
the words, so someone read for me.
I’ve
always believed in the healing power of writing. The catharsis of dumping my
feelings onto the page has gotten me through many a crisis. But I’ve learned
that weaving those musings into a story and sharing it with others is where the
real healing comes.
Becoming a mother is what society expects of every woman. It is the natural order of things, which makes me unnatural, abnormal. Being made to feel "less than" - not fully a woman - silenced me in many social situations and made me feel like I had nothing to say. A slight turn of the back to close you out of the circle of conversation; a change of subject to something that doesn't include you. This is how people are marginalized. It's not always done with evil intent. In fact, it's usually quite unintentional. But the result is the same - isolation.
Writing this story - my story - brought release; sharing it brought
healing. I returned to the Circle certain that now that I’d written my journey
down I’d have no trouble reading it. But when the stone passed to me, I
started and stopped, started and stopped, barely able to push the words past
my throat. The others waited patiently and gave me the time I needed. I got through
it. I told my story about being a childless woman. I found my voice.
I’m
grateful to the women of the Circle for their boundless support. My experience
with the anthology project has given me courage to follow through with another
dream – helping others fulfill their writing aspirations. I currently host Just Write (http://www.meetup.com/Just-Write-in-Collegeville-PA/, a weekly writer’s group.
Patty earned a BA in Journalism
and History from Indiana University and teacher certification from Ursinus College.
A National Novel Writing Month winner in 2011, Patty enjoys writing
short stories, memoir, and the occasional poem. But most of her writing energy
is focused on finishing her first novel. Patty resides in Pottstown, PA with
her husband, Rich, and their three cats, Sarah, Splash, and Snapple.
